Success

Saturday, I sat down as I do every year and watched the Kentucky Derby. I have thought in years past that I would want to go to the event but it has just never materialized. It looks like a fun event but I would have to be out in the sun all day and I know how I do with that – not good. That is completely immaterial to this post.

Yesterday saw a fairly quick race ran and won by the 5-2 favorite Big Brown, beating out the filly Eight Belles. Eight Belles made an attempt to be the fourth filly to win the Kentucky Derby. Big Brown ran a good race not using too much energy at the beginning and pull out to a definitive win. Big Brown, his jockey as well as the whole team were seen celebrating the day’s success. There was numerous personal interest stories were being told in relations to the winning horse. While all this was going on, the second place horse Eight Belles ended up suffering two broken front ankles. The decision was immediately to have her euthanized.

As I saw all this playing out on TV, I have to tell you it did strike a chord with me. A horse that was so close to winning the Kentucky Derby and still submitting a great performance regardless of the result was gone in a matter of moments. There was no enjoyment of the accomplishment of her efforts and obviously no opportunity to build upon it.

The lesson in this instance is simple. Success is something that is tough to come by and should be enjoyed when you are experiencing because it can be snatched away without notice. Success comes in many different flavors and how it is perceived is up to those experiencing it as well as those who are the successful person. Success to some is “nothing more” than having their health while others put success on bank accounts and luxury items. Of course there are numerous measurements for success that one can use.

It seems the timing of all this is interesting since recently I was given a small reminder to not take anything for granted. I have been given a small setback if you will that will be temporary but nonetheless have a long term impact on my life. While this was going on, I was offered a nice “vote of confidence” which is a byproduct of hard work and diligence- as well as opportunity - on my part. In the end, both the setback and “vote of confidence” will be perceived as good things because of their bi products. The setback is not positive but there were plenty of very nice attributes that came along with it. Failure is sometimes like that. Overall, much like beauty, success lies in the eye of the beholder.

Essay on life

I find myself pontificating again...
Do you ever ask yourself from time to time, “Who am I?” If your answer is reciting the information from your drivers license, I might tell you to rethink the question. Someone told me when I asked them the question, “I like to shop, boat, be outside and be 100% in a relationship”. Please keep in mind this has nothing to do with the responses of women as I know similar responses have been made by men.

We live in a world where I know a good portion of people define themselves by the car they drive, the house they live in, the hand bags they tote, the designer clothes and shoes they don and anything else in their possession. We all go out on the weekend and have a good time doing whatever it is that makes us happy whether it be shopping, bar hopping, or work on some hobby. The funny thing is none of those things will be brought up at your funeral. Please be clear that I don’t want people to live like peasants but to keep things in perspective. Can leasing the $500/month car/SUV make you happy? Will the 4000 square foot home make you a better person than someone who has 2000 square feet of living space? Does having designer clothes garner respect from your peers? (Please note - by all means wear clothes and don't turn to loin cloths especially this time of year!)

In other cases people use their relationships – specifically romantic - to define themselves and their worth as individuals. It is amazing to me how many people I know that have the same perspective of the woman above who is “100% into her relationships”. There is nothing but their romantic relationship and their job. I don’t mean to be crass but for some I am sure the job is only there to feed themselves. Otherwise they would only have the relationship.

Think about your life as two interlocking circles as pictured on top. Compare that to a relationship and even while you are it think about in terms of your life even if you are not attached right now. The middle section is what you share in the relationship with the other person. Where the circles don’t intersect is you alone and the other circle is your partner. If you are single think about the other circle as your job. Make sure you as a person does not completely cover the other circle. Make sure in anything you do you don’t completely cover it. You have plenty to give and to have it all go to one thing in the end is probably not good.

A person must be continuing to expand their horizons to not only improve their relationships with themselves but with friends, family, or spouse. If new things are not being discovered then life in general will stall and your relationships will not continue to advance.

People should always take inventory in their lives. They should to see where they have been, where they are right now, and where they are traveling to based on their current actions. Even before they do that, they need to continue to ask themselves the tough question like “What is it I want?” and “What can I do?”

Personally speaking I try to “take stock” in my life from time to time. I am not going to sit here and tell you I am living a fully purposed life. I am living a slightly self absorbed life but will admit my life needs a slight change. I am looking into it and now just looking to see what opportunities are available to me.
As you contemplate this more than a mouth full of words, I give you the poem I put into graduation and wedding cards from Ralph Waldo Emerson:

Success
To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children;
to earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others;
to leave the world a bit better,
whether by a healthy child,
a garden patch
or a redeemed social condition;
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.